Monday, September 7, 2009

Bredator Bosing aj Reborter?

Diyar Jirga,

Blij pe advijed that a bredator ij coming with das pooch.

Wahamullah haj learned that the bredator ij a wimmens, yani ki janaanaa. Blij make sure to check under burqa phor id-e-ntity.

Hij salaah phor all mullaj ij to pe habby with khushboo. No bredator will imbersonate khushboo.

Salaams,

Al-Okullah

Monday, August 31, 2009

James Baithulla 007

Cousin e Royale

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Bredator-e-Drone-a-Charya are coming

Mullah Gadhan,

Joo pring some deadly neuj. Ij the houri in this neuj ahter our id-e-ntity:

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=8359356

Theej are bhery khatarnaak timej phor Mullahs. Blij to convene phor Shura in Cave Numper 420.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Appeal.

Diyar all,
AoA
Asslamalaykum,

Todin i got a daak-e-bijjli asking apout
residents maulanas yand Amirs yand Ayotollahs.

Now iph eet was apout ayeshas, eet would hape been
narmal. Eet asksj sekrets, which eye say eej
blasphemous!!!!
pliss to issue broper fatwa.

Friday, August 7, 2009

List-e-twittur!

Aao tweet karein:

http://twitter.com/Al_Okullah
http://twitter.com/inekuddin
http://twitter.com/nayakuddin
http://twitter.com/apdul
http://twitter.com/Gubomaster <-- Armitaraj? Breadtor? http://twitter.com/napaki
http://twitter.com/Abdulsaleemgad
http://twitter.com/lalbrofessor

Aljo phollow:

motorhams:

http://twitter.com/naveenaqvi (Babe-e-neuj)
http://twitter.com/marvi_memon (hubba hubba)

Technalajee-e-tweet

Salaams Piratherj,

A little chidiya sat on my shoulder and bolo tweet tweet.

Ujing thij new techn-e-lajee ij the fatwa-e-LMU.

Subhanallah! Blij to tweet Al_Okullah aljo. Mullah Wahamullah ij imprejjed.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

LMU moves to social media

NSN: Unconfirmed reports are coming in that with enlightened moderation and lightbulb insertion being practiced at the LMU campus, the LMU faculty, including the dean himself have decided to try out the latest in social revolutionary technlogies: Twitter. Being great twits themselves, this is but a natural extension of their talent. LMU faculty hope to spread their knowledge, personal thoughts and fatwas far and wide using this mechanism.

One may find the dean's twitter stream at:

http://twitter.com/lalbrofessor

His other streams and emissions are captured by his devoted students.

NSN, Tall, Fair and Upright reporting, bring you only the best, if only in 140 characters.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Monday, June 22, 2009

True bakistani, neglected by sitaara tv broadcast....

Sitara tv did not show true bakistani kalchar.

I dekh match and there ij Baki osama , baki by birth and also by choice.
Yet all thij is censored.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Allah-Hu-Fubar

Deeyar Loined Mullahs and other eggsperts,

Bliss to accept my abologies phor the loong apsence of leave phrom the mecca oph knowledge and the sulabh souchalya oph ze internetz.

It seems that I make lot of admins nervous with my presence in BRF. Since I ask too many uncomfortable questions and force them frequently look under their yellow-streaked undies to confirm the existence of certain man-parts from time to time, an evil yahudi-yindu conspiracy called 'goldberg-shikhandi' manure was tried on me and was banned.

Many shukriyas to the biraders who gave me a haath and their tender company in the BENIS dhaaga.

May the djinn of genital warts visit the yellow-bellied rats who stabbed me in the back.

Allah-hu-fubar
Allah-hu-fubar
Allah-hu-fubar

Your jihadistically,
Nayakuddin

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

kross Bostings.

Sarry, to bost other beoble works, BENIS dhaaga now a dins

hape very many drone attacks, hence eye think eet eej good

to save invaluable Gems safe phrom erasure.

Diyar Raghullah al Nathi
the pakistani team fielded 1.5 members (big latif and khushboo) to deal with the 1:10 yani ke 15 yindoos as per their instruction manual. but due to cunning yindu trick, they changed the ball from gola to tatta and then big latif waj kanphujed. when mauling he grabbed the wrong hooker and then khushboo got a damn good rucking, only that the yindo team were still in the changing room.
thereaphtar cunning yindoos declared victory and converted khushboo to kaffirism and took her away from big latif at a delicate moment with his prop forward, so had to do his own up and under. sharam sharam time
yours
Lalprafesar al SportIllustrati

That was by Broffessar LM in reply to this pooch

AoA, I have a pooch. How ij tall, phair adn taight asssed bious bakistanis loje to shaart darak rice eeting kufr indians in rugby. bhat haapened to 1 bakistani equal to 10 kufr yindoos??. I shmell a kaanspiracy. What ij happening to land of bure's haanar and deegnity (H&D)?? :(( :(( .

 

 

It eej haram for hasina atim bum to be alone with talipanchacha in the car without four witnesses, especially when wearing such un-halaal kameez. when unkil gave baksheesh for tanks, he did not mean tank tops. i think we immediately need to punish hasina atim bum with 100 stribes, kanfiskate her haraam bums and have dilbullah take her in for remedial studies and treatment. talipan chacha will have to maalish his own mijjiles for a few weeks in repentance

lalprafesar-e-fatwaii
LMU

 

This again is by Brof,LM anal-lysing deeply this bichor

pakistan

 

 

There was a mard from madarss
Whose balls were made of brass
In ishtormy weather they clanged together
And sbarks phlew out oph his arss*

 

dat was by Amir N^3 as an ode to Chutkar Khan exploits.

Salam

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Istronge Repuff

Prejident Zardar10%i ispokemard janaab Fatehaal Barber

haj istrongly repuffed infedal CIA klaims oph Amir OBL

presence in Bakistan. “When NWFP yand FATA eej kontroled

Talipan, then how kome CIA klaims Amir OBL  in Bakistan hain?” da Janaab

told NSN. He further warned CIA to not to ispread lies apout

Bakistan or else………. in da excitement NSN phorgot to ask

else what? apologies in advance.

calls to CIA ophice has not been returned.

pliss kelik where eet saysej Kelik phor pura khaber.

NSN (T.N.T.)

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Benis aayaa, Bahaar aayee

Akbar oooh Archanullah

Benis haj discarded the burqa like a ujed towel! Glory pee to Benis' ankle!

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Calender-e-Bakstan

Diyar LMU maulanas and stud-e-nts! the intezaar is over!! I am broud to bresent pefore yu the opphicial cal-e-ndar of LMU. Bure and bious Bakstani Talipan cal-e-ndar. Thij will not onlee edmucate yu apout the great bakstan on your packside, put also helb yu blan for IED cel-e-prations etc. Bliss to pe using this cal-e-ndar in your caves phrom now on and throw out thost kufr Aishwalida Rai and Heidi Kalams!
This ij naat my creation so bliss to naat credit me. Yu know Al Baqr never takes undue credit - visa nor mastercard. These are bainstakenly brebared py brafessar heric nairgolis bin IED-ka-Chaandi. Blis to send him your salams, a total of 72 lactating goats, and some of the 400 young tight munnas yu have apdukted todin. The whole cal-e-ndar ij in BDF phormat (bort-e-ple document phormat) (this clar-e-fication is phor yu kaffir lurkers, no BDF ij naat standing phor Bangla Deshi F'ers). The full BDF can pe downloaded phrom http://www.megaupload.com/?d=6J20WPH0

Ok mujahids, rebeat after me:

Jaan-E-vari!


Febr-E-vari!


Maar!

Abril!


Maai!


Jooon!


Julaaai!


Agast!


$hitampar!


Oct-o-par!


Nov-e-mper!


Dec-e-mper!


Diyar ishtoodents, thij creation oph LMU ij another in the series oph many creative contriputions to the world such as boetry, bhotoshopped and genuwhine bicchars, NSN farticles and bojitiveneuj plog. Bliss to learn and work hard to create such mast-e-rbieces.

yours in the tabela-e-bakri,
Al Baqr bin cal-e-nderi.

Benis Dhaga escapes in a Burqa

Now that dear Benis haj pecome invijiple like a Djinn, Wahamullah haj commented:


tu parda-nasheen ka aashiq hai
yoon chup-chup kae deedar na kar

dil jalta hai to jalnae dae
aasoon na bahaa fariyaad ka nar