A field reborter's conundrum

Diyar birader Al Mastani:

May Biss pee ubon You.

Lalmohan wrote:

my diyar birader al jharkhandi welcome back from your travels to the bosom of your nation and ummah. i like the way you are thinking. I can help. . . . . . . lalmareech al mastani

I appreciate your kind invitation, and of course I would love nothing more that sipping some hot zam zam cola again listening to the glorious advice from other birathers about stock markets, and of course our usual topic, goat husbandry and rearing.

There is however the small matter of some ankle jewelery that prevents me from traveling farther than a certain distance from home. Not to mention the shadow of satan that still travels with it. I must therefore restrict myself to correspondence for now.

The neighborhood iron worker is waiting for some parts for his welding machine, so hopefully I will be still able to join the next meeting.

Until then, I will appreciate if you can do help with with due diligence in the following stocks: Amalgamated Houris Ltd (AHL.JnS), 72 Of The Pharest Inc (72Ps.Jns), and the exchange traded fund (ETF) Fauji Jannat Index Fund - Houri Scheme (FJIh.JnS).

The ETF is somewhat lopsided in the favor of houri sector, but then that is what the maulvi has advised investing in any way. I am conflicted though, because they have high management fees, and also get additional kickbacks in terms of additional houris from the indexed holdings.

Yours in anticipation

Sulaiman Al Beshawari, of Jharkhand, temp assignment Beshawar, phoren return.

Experts' response to latter

my diyar birader al jharkhandi

welcome back from your travels to the bosom of your nation and ummah. i like the way you are thinking. I can help. Come to the musharraf gate of jamia hafsa as i have instructed al nayakuddin to do after dark, there you shall be met and advised in all manner of ways regarding the houri market.

we have a lot of experience in these matters, and a lot of stock. We may allow you to sample. As they say, jo nahin khaye woh pachtaye, aur joh khaye, woh to khush ho jaye, or words to that effect.

If you prefer something more modern, we can accomodate you in auntie shamim's accomodations further up the street. She and I have a good understanding after our recent 'discussions' at the JHM (Jamia Hafsa Madrassah). Or if you prefer something more traditional, we have some good goat farms a short drive out of the city.

But please do swing by at the musharraf gate, we have some very hot stock tips for you that will warm your tips. All at very reasonable prices.

Looking forward to seeing you here!
yours
lalmareech al mastani

Latter to the edithar

Friends:

As you know, since returning from the Caribbean retreat, I have been looking into business opportunities to shore up my financial health. A suitor without a decent set of suits does not beget any khushboo, if you know what I mean (and to which I add hesitantly, nudge nudge, wink wink, eh).

So I have looked into investing short term in the jannat stock markets. A local maulvi has direct connections with some brokers there and promises better returns than the respected Peer Double Shah. I am thinking about it seriously in part since the peer is not taking contributions at this moment.

The maulvi recommended houri suppliers sector, citing volatile neighborhood conditions. His second suggestion is to look into air vacuum sector, also for similar reasons. Now it appears that there is a stable demand for houris, and it is a mature sector. For example, a cursury look a recent happenings reveals - agency report , agency report , and analyst comments. This is just off the top of the pile.

Now my questions to the learned folks is, has the market been speculated too much already? The 50 and 200 day moving averages, as well as the ricardean oscillators reveal a top might be forming simply due to the sector not anticipating the steep demand and may not meet the quarterly estimates. 72 is a large multiplier, after all.

What do people think, should I invest in the houri sector? You also get to go to annual meetings, where sometimes beta models of houris are also demonstrated to the shareholders. Or should I choose the more conservative air vacuum sector? The returns are lower, but the risk of losing my shirt is not as much either.

In anticipation,

Sulaiman Al Jharkhandi, foreign return, temp. assignment Beshawar, NSN